It was a mighty duel.
The date was Saturday, March 24th 2012. The weather was warm - unseasonably warm - though the sky was overcast. Two ancient foes faced each other over the field of battle. What led the world to such a place? How did history choose this idyllic spacetime coordinate as the unsettling scene of what was to follow? It must have been forechosen by the threads of the fates, for no mortal could have brought it about. One contestant in this battle was a human male - young, skinny, and unassuming. The other - an abomination from the outer reaches of the imaginable, composed of metals, polyvinyl chloride, and fibrous organic substances. The battle began in the morning, and lasted into the afternoon. First the rigid shell of the monster was extracted from the earth, and then the beast was attacked in it's own territory. The stump of a tree - long dead and rotting away was destroyed in the fight as well as a trowel. Cubic feet of earth were thrown up into the air by the wild swing...